Thursday, October 17, 2013

Meeting Your Match Online

So, I was the worst online dater on the planet. Many of my friends have met great guys through Internet dating sites. I, on the other hand, not so much. I knew I was in trouble after signing up for, when my initial match was my first cousin. Not a happy surprise, and no doubt, a bad omen. My other attempts failed miserably too. Either I met younger guys who wanted to be with a woman with experience, or I encountered men who were much older, and I just could not get excited about them.

Regardless of my own futile attempts, online dating is a fast growing field. But how big is this market? Statistics vary. Reuters publishes that annual revenue from online dating sites comes to $1.04 billion. According to global market research firm IBIS World, however, revenue in this area has grown an average of 2.9 per cent annually for the past five years and is expected to hit nearly $2 billion in 2013. Either way, the scope of the business is huge. Why the rapid increase? Credit baby boomers and new niche dating sites in particular for driving expansion. Old standbys also comprise a large community. has 15 million members, while eHarmony totals 20 million.

So, how do you meet a good catch online? Well, as my close friend says, "You have to kiss a lot of frogs."
  1. Smile for the camera. It all starts with the photos. Take multiple pictures in different outfits and post your best shots. Expect to put up at least five. When people go with just one or two, a good response is highly unlikely.

  2. Spruce up your profile. Compose a description of yourself that is fun, catchy and expresses your positive attitude. Guys are attracted to women who are bubbly, confident and warm.

  3. Be patient. While you may be looking for a long term relationship, be prepared to go out on a lot of dates. It takes time to find someone you really enjoy being with who feels the same way about you. Chemistry may be immediate, but caring takes a while to develop.

  4. Leave your baggage at the door. Everyone feels damaged after divorce. Whether your Ex has cheated, the romance has fizzled or the two of you are just ill suited and have agreed to part ways, both parties must try to gain something from the loss. Focus on the lessons you have learned so that your next relationship can be better.

  5. Handle the kids with care. My children did not like the idea of me meeting strangers on the Internet when I had previously told them not to communicate with anyone they did not know online. Hypocrisy never goes over well. Be sure you get to know your significant other and have built a tight bond with him before introducing that person to your kids. It is always best not to rush into anything and to develop a genuine connection first.
What are your online dating experiences?


  1. I'm nervous that the guy I get matched with will lie on his profile. How do I weed out the liars???

    1. That's a really good question. I would search for people on the Internet and try to determine if their pictures are actually them. If you choose to meet him, always select a meeting spot that is a very public coffee shop in the middle of the day. That way you can feel him out in person. Trust your judgment and take your time getting to know him before committing to anything

  2. You know what? Eventually you get real good at reading between the lines. And if you're still interested, after a phone call, then you can even weed out more. There are the few that make it through to an initial meeting. Good luck.

    Take a look at my internet experience:

    Just follow to the next post with the Continue link at the end of the post.

  3. I joined and I had an amazing ride. Learned a lot right away. I feel that the people who just try to chat with one right away are not real. Not real, meaning that they are either visitors for the day or are a scam. Some even e-mailed me, but their profile disappeared after a day. Some tried to push that I call their phone numbers or e-mail to their private e-mails. I would google some of the names and found out that some women already mentioned the person as a scam. Some are just for a romance. Supposedly a soldier chatted with me from Afghanistan. I agree, one develops a feeling for who may be real and who may not. It is a bummer to miss a wink from a man, whom I would have liked chatting with.